This post may, at first, seem like it has nothing to do with the library. But I hope you will follow along and see that it where it goes.
It has been a while since I posted because my husband and I had to travel out of town. My mother-in-law, Eleanor, died at the age of 91. I first met her at her 75th birthday party while my husband and I were dating. She was formidable then and right until the end. She raised 4 boys who are 7 years apart in age. (I married the baby!) She taught typing at an all boy's private school and sat on the many committees both in church, the dental community (her husband was a dentist) and community at large. So many newspaper clippings attest to all these endeavors. By the time I had met her, she had been divorced for over 20 years and outlived her former husband by several years. At the time of her death, they had been divorced for longer than they had been married. Her 4 sons living in 3 different states with their families.
I never met my husband's father. I have nothing to go on but the family tales I have heard during the few occasions when all the boys are together in one spot. My mother in law never spoke of him in the 17 years I knew her.
When she died, she left behind a suitcase, securely tied, that had been in the room of her assisted living center for as long as I could remember. It was never opened and no one knew what the contents were until after her funeral when we finally had a moment to sit and open it together. So much speculation! Inside were some treasures of a lifetime. College yearbooks, teaching certificates, photos of people and places long gone by, newspaper clippings, her wedding album and a box full of letters.
The letters were love letters that her husband had written to her while he was in Pittsburgh finishing his last year of dental college. This was the year before their marriage. She had kept them for over 60 years! They were all in their original envelopes. I opened and read a few of the most romantic and loving letters ever. They were full of mundane details of the day he had, tidbits about his education interspersed, and always ending with, proclamations of his love and affection. Some had cards from florist deliveries tucked inside the envelope. I am not ashamed to say that they made me cry. For the first time, I got a peek into the only man she ever married, the love of her life, and the love she still carried for him. So powerful were the pictures those words painted of a life full of love and promise. So powerful those words still were when read all those years later. So powerful that she would keep this written record of their love despite the passage of time and dissolution of the marriage. My niece and I poured over the pile with delight.
My reaction to the letters was very different than those of my sister-in-law, husband and brother-in-law. While I only knew ONE of the players in the game, they knew both. Their perspective, their history and their understanding of past events gave them a connection to the letters much different than those of my niece and I. While they were not moved to tears, their reactions were just as strong.
So as I return back to library land, and hopefully some white boxes indicating my book order has arrived, I think about the power of the written word. I think about how people can have completely different reactions to the same book. Our genre preferences, our favorite author and the choices of new authors are influenced by our past, our experiences and our relationships. Friends recommend books. Book clubs recommend books. Book lists tell us what everyone else is reading. But the bottom line is: Do I like the book? Did I have a positive reaction to it? Did I enjoy the journey the author took me on and where he/she left me at the end of the book?
Kids are like that too! On the surface, they all want to read the latest Diary of a Wimpy Kid book. But dig deeper and you will discover that they all have a different perspective on the same book. Some want to read it because they love the character. Some want to read it because everyone else is reading it. Some want to read it because a grown up bought it for them and thought they should read it.
So I am hoping that I have harnessed "the power of the written word" in my book order selections and that everyone finds a book that speaks to them even if it doesn't speak to someone else in the same way.
So here's to you, Eleanor, and your suitcase full of love from a lifetime ago! Your memories, in written form, created a powerful memory for me to cherish.
Bix, the eloquence of your words and the sentiment expressed here is so beautiful. My eyes are filled with tears as I am writing this.
ReplyDeleteThank you Fran. It was a powerful moment for me.
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